Friday, June 8, 2012

Friday's Top Ten

Don't forget about Friday's HOT Fireman on my Facebook Page!


Last week's top ten was all about Gabe the Firefighter. Today's is all about Summer.

The top ten things to remember if you are in the Federal Witness Security Program:

10. Memorize all the data about your new life and who you are

  9. Don't use Ancestry.com

  8. Don't write a memoir

  7. Don't act suspicious around everyone you meet

  6. Don't call your grandmother on her birthday

  5. Don't tell anyone where you were born

  4. Don't keep a photo of your parents on your mantel

  3. Never drink so much wine you forget your current name

  2. Don't enter politics

And the #1 thing to remember if you are in the Federal Witness Security Program:

  1. Never, ever wear this tee
From Cafe Press

38 comments:

Laura Eno said...

Always good things to remember, Carol! Have a great weekend. :)

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Yeah, the t-shirt is a dead giveaway!

mybabyjohn/Delores said...

All kidding aside, I can't imagine anything more horrible.

Jennifer Shirk said...

Ha! Number 3 would definitely be bad! :-)

L.G.Smith said...

Uh, number three would be tough.

Journaling Woman said...

FunnnEEEEy. Love it. I'm always saying things about the witness protection program. I had a law enforcement friend say, the witness protection program isn't fun. I said, REALLY. Have you tried it?

T

Summer Ross said...

LOL_ thanks for the laugh this morning.

Linda Kage said...

LOL!!! I want one of those shirts!

Linda G. said...

LOL! (And I sincerely hope I never have to join the program.)

Clarissa Draper said...

Very funny! Love the t-shirt.

LD Masterson said...

Oh yeah. Gotta have one of those shirts.

Ciara said...

LOL,love the t-shirt. I could barely focus on your post after you mentioned the hot fireman. :)

Julie said...

The t-shirt cracked me up! Great list, and it made me even more interested in your story because I'm so intrigued by Summer's situation.

Have a great weekend! :)

Mason Canyon said...

I always enjoy your Friday's Top Ten. I know I'm going to laugh or at the very least smile. Thanks for the laugh today. Love the tee shirt.

Mason
Thoughts in Progress

Johanna Garth said...

Good advice Carol and bonus points because you reminded me I need to call my grandmother.

Carol Kilgore said...

Laura - Especially for you and me - LOL!

Alex - Dead. Right.

Delores - Well, I can. But not too much.

Jennifer - Yesh :)

L.G. - Always having to monitor your intake, LOL!

Carol Kilgore said...

Teresa - LOL! I often imagine people to be in the program when I'm people watching.

Summer - You're welcome!

Linda K - So do I!

Linda G - Good luck with that :)

Clarissa - You, me, and Linda K ... the Three Witnesseers, LOL.

Carol Kilgore said...

LD - Oops, and now we're four. Maybe we can get a discount :)

Ciara - Five. Maybe more...I may have forgotten someone from above. I need to go check on that fireman :)

Julie - Yea, my evil plan worked, LOL!

Mason - 99% of the time, smiles are my Friday goal.

Johanna - Good. Omas and Nanas need love, too :)

Maryann Miller said...

LOL, love the shirt. Some doofus would probably order one.

Arlee Bird said...

I probably wouldn't be out wearing the T-shirt, but I'm sure I'd screw up on a few of the rest.


Lee
Tossing It Out

welcome to my world of poetry said...

Enjoyed your list, especially about not calling grandmother on her birthday, my grandchildren "Forgot"
Great post.

Yvonne.

Carol Kilgore said...

Maryann - You never know - might be a good "hiding in plain sight" disguise.

Arlee - I think it would be hard not to mess up at least once.

Yvonne - Let's hope they remember next year :)

J.L. Campbell said...

Funny stuff, Carol. In the crime serials, you gotta have a witness like that who forgets why they're in the programme in the first place. :)

Writer Pat Newcombe said...

Love the tee shirt, Carol! I must get your book - your character and me share the same surname!

Heather M. Gardner said...

But I like that shirt! Can I get it in black?
Very funny.
Heather

Carol Kilgore said...

J.L. - What a great idea! I may steal it :)

Pat - It's a sign! It's a sign!

Heather - Secret...I like it, too :) And yes, it does come in black with white words.

Stephen Tremp said...

All very good advice should I ever be in that situation. Of course, I have a wormhole in my garage in case I need to make a speedy exit.

Carol Kilgore said...

Stephen - Perhaps the U.S. Marshals would be interested in renting the wormhole from time to time. Just sayin' :)

MTeacress said...

True, about the hiding in plain sight thing...but still, I don't think I'd wear that shirt. ;)

Have a good weekend, Carol!

Jess said...

Lol, yeah, I think that shirt might give it away... Have a great weekend, and happy summer :)

Old Kitty said...

Friday's Firefighter man has got some ABS on him!!! Oh I hope he brings me a bucket of cold water!!! Well he can bring whatever he wants so long as I can drool and touch. Ahem!

I must remember these very handy tips and wise advice if ever I am in such a programme! :-) Take care
x

Carol Kilgore said...

Michelle - How about to a costume party with of mask of a celebrity. Maybe Queen Elizabeth, complete with crown :)

Jess - Happy Summer back!

Old Kitty - You may need to push me out of the way to get that close...but I digress :)

Nas said...

LOL! I would wear the Tee- shirt anyway and see who believes!

Carol Kilgore said...

Nas - Be careful :)

Medeia Sharif said...

Great list and that shirt is a no-no.

Have a great week.

LR said...

Indeed, no. 3 is important!

Carol Kilgore said...

Medeia - And yet, they sell :) Hope you have a wonderful week, too.

Carol Kilgore said...

LR - Yes it is. Where's the barkeep?