Top ten signs you might need a beer:
10. You're late to pick up kids from school, back out of your driveway, and knock over your fully loaded trashcan that still hasn't been picked up.
9. The trashcan falls on the neighbor's cat.
8. The cat screeches and flies into the street in front of the neighbor's car.
7. The neighbor swerves to avoid her cat and hits the streetlight pole.
6. The streetlight falls onto the fire hydrant and opens the valve.
5. Water fountains from the hydrant onto the cat, who's busy inspecting the spilled trash, and pushes the cat into the street. Again.
4. The neighbor gets out of her car, tries to catch her cat, and slips on the wet pavement - right in front of the teenager from the next block who thinks he's Jimmie Johnson and Helio Castroneves rolled into one.
3. The teenager slams on his brakes, slides into the trashcan (sending it flying into the air), up onto the sidewalk, and comes to a stop in your yard - inches from a massive oak.
2. While you're gawking at the teen, the trash can plummets to earth upside down and lands on top of you, knocking you to the ground.
And the #1 reason you might need a beer:
1. Your cell rings. It's your husband. "Hey, I'm bringing my boss home for dinner. Can you make lasagne?"